And Then There Were None

This past weekend, I had the honor of participating in a healing retreat for former abortion clinic workers. And Then There Were None, the organization which held the retreat, was founded by former clinic director and one of my dearest friends, Abby Johnson. 

At first, I felt a bit intimidated. As one of the only ones at the retreat who had not worked at a clinic, I wondered if they would accept me or even want me there. My fears were put to rest very quickly. The former workers welcomed me warmly and received me into their circle. 

There are so many thoughts and revelations swirling through my head since the retreat. These women shared their experiences, thoughts, and struggles with shocking honesty. Some of them have been out of the industry for quite some time. Even their families do not know about their participation in the industry. They literally have no outlet to share their burden with, so when they come together, it all pours out. 

I am not going to go into their specific stories because they are not mine to share. I do want people, particularly people in the pro-life camp to understand a few things. 

1) No one is unreachable.  Consider the Saul-to-Paul conversion. Can you imagine the surprise of those early Christians when they learned that the very one who had persecuted and murdered them was now their brother in Christ? I think God was very intentional in choosing Paul. He wanted to show us that his grace is greater than any sin. That sin isn't broken down into tiers. 

2) No one can be shamed to Christ.  What I saw before me this weekend were repentant, heavily burdened women who know what they have done. No one can judge them more than they have already judged themselves. Several of them explained what the reactions of their churches or closest friends have been upon their sharing with them that they were a part of the industry. It was anything but grace-filled. One former abortionist was told not to mention her past to her "Forgiven and Set Free" Bible study. Was anyone else encouraged not to share about their past? I doubt it. If you don't know what to say, say nothing. Give a hug. 

3) Abortion clinic workers are not bad people.  I am not going to go into the grizzly reality of abortion. I think we all know that it is gory. It is hard for most of us to picture ourselves doing the things that these workers have done. If you were to sit with them and listen, or take their phone calls when they finally decide to leave, you would come to a place of understanding. This does not excuse their sin, but ask yourself, have you ever been a part of anything that you knew from the start was wrong, yet continue? Oftentimes, clinics will advertise for a medical assistant, say that they will train the right person, and offer a great benefit package. One worker described her interview. 

"It was a Friday, which was not a procedure day. All I knew was that it was a women's health clinic. I was hired on the spot," she said. "When I started on Tuesday, I was shocked to find that it was an abortion clinic. I went to the manager and asked her why she didn't tell me. She assured me that I would only be working the recovery room and doing administrative work."
Before long, she was piecing together body parts and holding the suction machine. When this woman's child died, she was sure it was because of the curse she had brought on her family by being a part of what went on at the clinic. 

Some women work at referral only clinics where abortions are not performed. Suddenly, they are told that they have to go to a different clinic to cover a shift and before they know it, they are in the middle of something they never imagined. 

The industry also does a good job of brainwashing these women and hardening them against the truth. I could write pages and pages about this, and may at another time. The bottom line is that no one wants to grow up and work at an abortion clinic. But we must know our enemy. They target idealistic college students and post-abortive young women in denial about their own abortions. They promise empowerment and deliver shame and death. When workers decide they want out, as pro-lifers, we must be there for them. 

4) The lives of the baby, mother, and worker are all of infinite value. If we truly believe in the sanctity of human life, then we must not place more value on one than another. Think if Paul had not been received by his new brethren because of his past? A good portion of the New Testament would be lacking. The loss of each child is a tragedy. The knowledge that one (or more) of her children is missing at her hand is a deep grief for a post-abortive mother. Experiencing a conversion and coming to the realization that you have been involved in the wholesale slaughter of children under the banner of "choice" is a burden that not many of us could bear. The babies, the mothers and the workers are all victims of the abortion industry. God created them all, and to him they are precious.

5) No one can do more to end abortion than former workers.  The abortion industry HATES former workers. Especially ones like Abby who refuse to be silenced. They can take her to court and threaten her, but they cannot shut her up. And they cannot keep her from helping people just like her leave the industry. To date, 139 workers have left the abortion industry through ATTWN. Several clinics have been shut down as a result of their testimony. There will be more. These workers know the industry's dirty secrets, and when they have had a conversion, there is NO ONE as on fire to end the evil of abortion than them. 

At the end of the retreat we decided to walk through a clinic that had recently closed and is in the process of being acquired by several pro-life organizations to be used for life. The clinic was left exactly as it was when it was in operation. There was blood on the walls in the procedure rooms and the POC lab. It was dirty. Walking through it had a heaviness that I cannot even explain. The thing that stood out to me the most were the quotes that the clinic had chosen to put on the wall in every room. 

This one was on the wall of the waiting room's restroom. I wondered how many women had stood there, looking themselves in the mirror wondering if they should go through with the abortion and been spurred on by this quote. 

I found this one to be particularly ironic. It was plastered on the wall of one of the procedure rooms. 

This one, on the wall of the recovery room, I thought was the saddest of all. What message was this sending to the hurting women sitting in that room who had just aborted their child? 

This weekend has taught me many things. It was intense and painful at times, but the way God chose to wrap it up was so perfect, so beautiful, only he could have orchestrated it. 

We had walked through the clinic. Some of us prayed together. The atmosphere was heavy and some needed to leave. As the workers loaded into the van, Abby and I watched as a crowd of people began to emerge from behind the clinic. There were children, teens, middle aged people and old folks of all skin colors. Suddenly, a tall black man belted out, "Abby!" 

The group of people were from a local church who had decided to come to the clinic to pray. They had been praying for the workers during our retreat, but they had no idea that we would be there. I love this picture taken in front of the clinic.

One other thing I would like to share. I wish I could name the retreat center that allowed us to come this weekend, but out of respect for the worker's anonymity, I won't. God knows, and I'm sure he will bless them. The chef was amazing and interactive, and the women serving us were sweet as pie. We didn't find out until later that these women, who we thought were employees of the retreat center, were actually part of a post-abortive Bible study and felt the need to come and serve these former clinic workers. Some of them drove four hours to do so.

Folks, if that isn't spiritual foot washing, I don't know what is. As Sanctity of Human Life Sunday rolls around, please pray for the evil of abortion to end. Pray for the babies, the women and men whose lives have been forever impacted, and for these brave, strong, former workers who I am proud to call friends. I am in awe of their understanding of grace and repentance and inspired by their determination to end abortion.